coogan

So I'm watching Whose Line is it Anyway on ABC Family, and commercial comes on for the new ABC Family Original Movie (ABCFOM?). Upon seeing the previews for this movie (and I use that term very loosely), my jaw slammed to the ground, through the floor of my house, and is currently burrowing it's way into the hard candy shell of the planet.

The name of this cinematic opus: Karate Dog

Yes. Karate. Dog. Two words that have no fucking business being next to each other.

Karate Dog. A dog. Who's a ninja. A dog ninja.

And guess who plays the villian of karate dog? Jon Voight.

So it's reached this. A four-time Academy Award nominee (with one win!) is now high-flying stunts and Matrix-style jumpkicks with a CGI mutt. Something tells me a 5th Oscar nomination isn't in the near future for ol' Jon boy.

For God's sake, he was in Deliverance! And he kicked ass! As opposed to what a few hillbillies did to Ned "weeee! weeee!" Beatty.

But back to Karate Dog. ABC Family is obviously part of the ABC network..uh..family. Which is owned by Disney. The same Disney that made classics like Fantasia, Snow White, Mary Poppins, and dozens of other movie classics. And now they're making....Karate Dog.

With Jon Voight.

I weep for American cinema.

Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens
Brown papper packages tied up with strings

These are a few of my favorite things


I figured I might as well post something, because while I'm not as post-crazy as Big S (and if I was, this place would be www.coogan.net**), I'm hoping all those phone calls and letters to my Congressman regarding my idea of tax credits for blog posts will eventually see some government action. By my calculations, my refund check would be 64 cents higher. Super-size fries on me!


So while my favorite things are not as colorful as Maria's, and also probably sound pretty stupid set to music, at least I can finally say "I did something with my life, damnit!"


On TV
If you're not watching My Name is Earl, then Karma's gonna bite you in the ass.

Whose Line is it Anyway needs to be released on DVD. I'll buy every single episode.
Get Lost. If you haven't seen it, watch it. Now.


Movies

I've never been a big Pixar fan, but The Incredibles is one of the most enjoyable movies I've ever seen.
On a completely different note, I caught Saw on Showtime last night. Pretty good movie. When you think about it, it's pretty amazing how much the American horror film genre has changed in the last 20 years.


That's it. What, you didn't expect me to give it all out in one post, did you? I know, the suspense is killing you. Sorry, you'll just have to check back later.


Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes

Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eye-lashes
Silver white winters that melt into springs

These are a few of my favorite things


**I really have no clue who owns www.coogan.net, but if you're gonna own it, at least freakin' maintain it!

I am the Magellan of the Internet. I google and don't look back. I surf with no mercy. I'm getting my kicks on Ultra ATA/66. I am the Intraweb!


And to prove my mastery of all things binary, hex, and octal (but not decimal, cuz that's for like, math geeks and stuff), here is my latest discovery:


Behold, Wikipedia!


Now, to find a site that sells books and dvds online. I shall return!

I have 4 stainless steel screws in my lower back. A week ago they weren't there. I'd most definitely NOT recommend surgery for anything unless it's absolutely necessary, even if you do get 6 weeks of paid medical leave off. The next time a doctor wants to put some metal into my body, it better be to make me some kind of indestructible Terminator

I didn't even know I had this. Shout out to the big S for hooking us up.


Maybe at some point I'll actually find something to post.